玛丽在30岁的时候与她丈夫离婚了。

她的离婚是有《圣经》依据的，但是她没有跟任何人说，因为她不想公开自己的私事。此外，她的前夫一家都是本地复临安息日会有声望的教友，她也依然参加

这个教会的聚会。

教会成员们完全无法理解为什么玛丽选择结束这段婚姻，并且他们因此责怪她。有些人甚至直接地告诉她，因为她离开她丈夫，她失去了得救的机会。

于是，从小就是在复临教会长大的玛丽不再参加安息日敬拜了，并最后远走他乡，在另一个城市开始了新生活。

但是这些过往的记忆一直在折磨她。就算在新环境里没有人因玛丽的离婚指责她，她还是不能遗忘这件事。玛丽感觉自己就是个失败者，她在想上帝还会不会爱离了婚的她。

她极度渴望得到答案，于是在网上输入了“上帝”两个字，太多的搜索结果令玛丽不知所措，就关掉了电脑。

打开电视，她盲目地换着频道。有一个灵恩派的频道吸引了她的注意力。但是灵恩派所提倡的靠着信心治愈和说方言让她吓坏了，玛丽不想再看下去。但是她注意到这个频道里有个每周一次的由一位女演讲者主持的节目。这位女士说话很镇定，并且合乎情理，玛丽看了好几周。

一天傍晚，这位女士讲到了原谅。

“没有人能靠自己去原谅他人，“她说，“你需要上帝的帮助。”

第二天早上开车去工作的时候，这些话在玛丽的脑海里回荡。突然间，她意识到她需要原谅她的前夫以及他的父母，和那些不友好的教友，最重要的是她需要饶恕自己。

她突然特别想向上帝祷告寻求帮助。

玛丽潸然泪下，她尝试着祷告，但是眼泪让她无法做到一边开车还一边祷告。于是她把车停到路边。

“我想去原谅他人，但是我做不到，”她祷告道，“如果我得到了原谅的能力这个礼物，（上帝，）我会跟随祢。

几乎是在一瞬间，她得到了回应。

“我会帮你。”一个和蔼的男声说道。

玛丽哭得更不能自己了，但是现在流下的全是喜乐的泪水。她知道天堂听到了她的祷告，并且保证会帮她。

玛丽在车里又待了30分钟。她向上帝保证，她会跟随上帝，但是她不太清楚要如何实现诺言。

“我从小就是作为一个复临信徒被抚养长大的，”她祷告道，“现在我应该怎么做呢？”

她想到一个答案：读《圣经》和怀爱伦的书籍。

玛丽回到家里洗了把脸，然后继续开车去工作。最后她迟到了一小时。

工作结束后，玛丽打开她的《圣经》开始阅读。她一有空就会读。当她失眠时，她会起来继续阅读《圣经》。玛丽以前从来就不喜欢阅读，但是现在她似乎怎么读都不满足。

“我读《圣经》是因为我想知道上帝到底是谁，”玛丽在采访中说道，“我读得如饥似渴。

一年之内，她读了三遍《圣经》，并且还读完了五本怀爱伦所著的历代之争丛书。

玛丽鼓起勇气后与本地的安息日教会牧师谈了她离婚的事。他专门为玛丽开了一个圣经学习小组。他希望这个圣经学习小组能帮助她再次回到教会和上帝的怀抱。

玛丽极其喜爱这个学习小组。

“我的心是火热的，因为我所读的填满了我的心，”她说。

圣经学习小组结束后，玛丽又开始定期参加安息日敬拜了。

过了一段时间，她见到了她原先的公公婆婆。她很吃惊地发现，她不再感到羞愧，并且对他们没有任何怨气了。现在她能把他们当朋友了。

玛丽也原谅了那些之前说话不友好的教友，她甚至都不记得他们的名字了。

“我感觉我被原谅了，”她说，“现在我的心很平静。”

如今，玛丽在她本地的教会中是一名很活跃的教友，并且成为了欧非分会中第十三个安息日项目的一位领袖。她依然每天读《圣经》，每年最少通读一遍，并且每天还花大概一小时来阅读怀爱伦的书籍。

在采访中，回想起当年上帝帮助她原谅他人、饶恕自己的时候，她的眼中充满泪水。

“上帝赐给我原谅的能力，”她说，“这件事从此永远改变了我和上帝的关系。”

Forgiveness After Divorce

Mary left her husband when she was 30.

She had biblical grounds for the divorce, but she didn’t say a word to anyone because she didn’t want to publicize private matters. Moreover, her former in-laws were respected members of the local Seventh-day Adventist church, which she still attended.

Church members didn’t understand why Mary’s marriage had ended, and they blamed her. Several bluntly told her that she had forfeited salvation by leaving her husband.

Mary, who had been raised in the Adventist Church, stopped worshipping on Sabbath and finally moved across the country to start a new life.

But inner demons tormented her. While no one condemned her divorce in the new town, she couldn’t forget it. She felt like a failure. She wondered whether God loved her despite the divorce.

Desperate for answers, she went online and typed the word “God.” The huge number of results overwhelmed her, and she switched off the computer.

Turning on the television, she clicked through the channels. A channel run by a charismatic Christian denomination caught her attention, but the faith healings and speaking in tongues frightened her. She refused to watch. But she noticed a weekly program hosted by a female speaker on the channel. The woman spoke calmly and sensibly. Mary watched regularly for several weeks.

One evening, the woman spoke about forgiveness.

“No one is able to forgive on their own,” she said. “You need the help of God.”

Those words returned to Mary’s mind as she drove to work the next morning. With a start, she realized that she needed to forgive her former husband and his parents, the unkind church members and, most of all, herself.

She felt an irresistible desire to pray to God for help.

Weeping, she tried to pray, but the tears made it impossible to drive and pray at the same time. She pulled over to the side of the road.

“I would like to forgive, but I am not able to do it,” she prayed. “If I get forgiveness as a gift, I will follow You.”

Almost immediately came the reply.

“I will help you,” a kind male voice said.

Mary cried even more — but now she was weeping for joy. She knew that heaven had heard her prayer and promised to help.

Mary remained in the car at the side of the road for another 30 minutes. She had made a promise to follow God, and she wasn’t sure how to fulfill it.

“I was raised an Adventist,” she prayed. “How should I now live?”

An answer came to mind: Read the Bible and the writings of church Ellen White.

Mary returned home to wash her face and then drove to work. She arrived an hour late.

After work, Mary opened her Bible and began to read. She read every spare minute. When she couldn’t sleep at night, she got up and read some more. Mary had never enjoyed reading books, but now she had a seemingly insatiable desire to read.

“I read because I needed to find out who God is,” Mary said in an interview. “I had such a huge hunger.”

In a year, she read the Bible three times and completed the five books of Ellen White’s Conflict of the Ages series.

Working up the courage, Mary spoke with the local Adventist pastor about her divorce. He formed a Bible study group just for Mary. He hoped that the Bible study group would help draw her back to church and God.

Mary loved the group.

“I was so enthusiastic because I was filled with the things that I had read,” she said.

After evangelistic meetings, Mary began to attend Sabbath services at the church regularly.

Sometime later, she saw her former in-laws. To her surprise, she felt no shame and no longer had any hard feelings toward them. They were friends.

Mary also has forgiven the church members who spoke unkindly. She can’t even remember their names.

“I feel forgiven,” she said. “I am at peace.”

Today, Mary is an active member in her local congregation and a leader of a Thirteenth Sabbath project in the Trans-European Division. She still reads the Bible daily, going through it at least once a year, and spends about an hour every day reading Ellen White’s writings.

In the interview, her eyes filled with tears as she remembered the day that God helped her forgive others and herself.

“I received forgiveness as a gift,” she said. “This story has forever changed my relationship with God.”